A WEEK AND A HALF!!!!! I think. "I don't have a memory for numbers"

SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!

SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!

I, little ol' me, will be seeing SIR JAMES PAUL McCARNTEY, HOT in 11 days (or something if I did my math right.)

Do you have any idea how irrational I am right now? 

I mean, um. 

Let me explain to you why this is the most important thing in the world, EVER just about. I've spent countless hours, days, months, years just insanely obsessing over anything Beatles. It's really, probably seemingly sadly true. But it was never time wasted. Vicki and I when we lived together, Friday night it would begin. 

Out came the Coke 

and the cigarettes 

and the cookie dough 

and we would marathon. Always replaying our favorite parts, some of which I'll share with you. We would start with Anthology, bust through ten hours of that, but not before watching this 'till the tape wore bad. (VHS homies. We're old school AND hardcore) 

...hello, Paul.....

then First US Visit (the whole thing is my favorite, but this was the shortest clip),

 then A Hard Day's Night, 

Help! (here's some funny moments for you to chew on.)

and Magical Mystery Tour. 

And sometimes our friend Michelle who called herself Butchie came over, and then the drinking games would begin. As your friend I tell you this. If you're ever playing a Beatles drinking game that involves doing a shot whenever your chosen Beatle smokes DO NOT CHOOSE RINGO.

or this will be you.

It's true. 

And then sometimes we'd watch "I Wanna Hold Your Hand" which is hilarious!!!

 And yes, it is time for full on Bealtemania. Even though, most sadly but probably best for Paul McCartney's sake and nerves, I'm not going to the Macca show with Beatle buddy Vicki. "I'm not in a laughing mood even" about that. 

Photoshop is King Boss. Same as Vanessa.

I love friends. I love friends with talents. And when friends with talents start putting me in pictures with hot guys, well I'm sure that you know where this goes. Immediate besties.

'Cause let's face it, I'll probably never be in the same room with Paul McCartney- WHAT AM I SAYING?! I will be in the same room as Paul McCartney on March 30th!!  But he probably won't be posing in pictures with me. So where does that leave a girl with dreams?

Photoshop.

So awhile ago I thought, "I'm gonna put me in a picture with Sean Lennon. He loves me. It'll be rad." And, not to toot my own horn or anything, but it turned out pretty awesome.

But then aforementioned Bestie!Vanessa busts out all kind of ninja on it and WHA-POW!

I was made to look like a stooge in the Photoshop contest.

A stooge, perhaps, but a stooge rubbing cigar elbows with Mr. Lennon.

And now she's on a terror of amazing awesomeness. Ready?

This is when Paul and I were singing together karaoke at Dimples in Pasadena, CA. We rocked it with our version of Gloria Gaynor's "I Will Survive". Everyone loved us and someone bought Paul a beer!

 

This is Paul and I in Cancun. We had a lot of Margaritas and somehow misplaced some money.  Good thing he brought his bass, we made a couple bucks back from some Canadian tourists. 

And here we are. Goofin'.

Vanessa has a bloggy, Little Deadness.  Go check it. She's an amazing photographer. And an amazing Photoshoppin' bestie. And my Ethel Mertz. 

I have my fingers crossed that she's not done. 

Alcatraz.

We went to San Francisco a couple years ago and for one thing, I love you, San Francisco and if it weren't for your silly baseball team and your affinity for fish, I'd move there in a minute!

San Francisco is amazing and if you've never been you should go. I have a BFF Vicki who lives up there. Hook up with her, I'm sure she'll let you stay. Yeah, no problems, I'm sure. She likes camping too, so maybe extra bonus points if you're of serial killer variety.

But yeah, San Fran, you're hip, dude. 

Everybody knows how sweet San Francisco is. 

Let me tell you about Alcatraz.

Alcatraz makes me wish I was a gangster or money launderer of the greatest offense, or both. And back in the 1950s. And then I'd duckbill my hair, steal some spoons from the slop house and dig my way out.  "To freedom?", you may ask.  No, I respond. Not yet. To the icy waters of the bay. Choppy, icy shark infested waters (I don't think there are really sharks) and I'd swim the mile and a half, against current and pop up on the shores of the The Embarcadero- 

okay, now I'm just making stuff up. But how cool would that be! Ah, man. 

Alcatraz. Did I mention that I am insanely obsessed with Alcatraz? And in a shocking twist of stuff, I didn't steal any of these photos! These were all taken by me. I know, what a photographer I've turned out to be. Oh, shush now, you're embarrassing me. 

See that bald guy at the back near the flag? That's not me. 

Before it was a prison, the island was a military base and they would just shoot the crap out of whatever boats they deemed necessary to bomb crap out of. And then because it was SO uninhabitable being it's just a rock out in cold icy waters, well, they turned it into a military prison, then a real prison. Or something. I don't know, I'm not a tour guide. Look it up. 

Look at the seagull! 

See the shadows in the right hand bottom corner? Way creepy, huh? But nope. 

Not ghosts. Just me and Billy. 

This one is WAY Shawshank looking huh? Except for those dudes back there. I could beat those dudes up. Get 'em with a shiv in the back if they looked at me wrong. Threaten 'em for their brownie and cigarettes. See, I know. I could totally be locked up in here. Michael Scofield style! 

And see how close San Francisco is? You can see the streets! That's so awesome! They said that prisoners could hear the sounds of the city and it would drive them crazy. Behind me when I took this picture is Cell Block C (ish) where the solitary confinement dudes - Like the Bird Man of Alcatraz were and on New Years Eve they could hear the music and celebrations, watch the fireworks. That's crazy! And not bad for prison life. Come on. Music, fireworks? Stop your whining, Prisoners of Old. 

This was a house! People used to live on the island, like the families of the people who worked at the prison and the kids used to play with inmates (don't worry about it, I'm sure they were all like the nice dudes from Green Mile) and then take the ferry to school everyday. How cool did they roll?!

And enjoy this So I Married an Axe Murderer Alcatraz moment. 

Okay, some links. 

Alcatraz wiki

one of a few sites where you can get tickets.

Now go see every movie ever made about Alcatraz. Like Escape from Alcatraz. Speaking of escaping from Alcatraz, I could totally do it. Did you see the Mythbusters episode on it? Oh those Mythbusters. I love them.  

Here's them talking about it. 

Hollywood Bowl + McCartney = ME!!! Part 1.

That's pretty much the gist of this here posty.  Braggery.

And yes. I am going to finally see Paul McCartney in the flesh. And I might flip out. If this was my Sean Lennon experience, can you even imagine what my level of fainting will be like with an actual Beatle?! I know. I better bring the salts.

Want to see into the future?

 March 30th, 2010. - me. 

(is that Linda McCartney?!)

So let's Rock n Roll and prepare to Paul!!!!!! 

This will be my first time! Have you ever seen him? Was he amazing? What's your favorite song he did? Oh my, I'll bring back a full report. 

The sisterhood of nothing.

"So, do you have a sister?" -

This is a question I am asked more often than you could possibly imagine. And I'm sure that I'm not asked more than anyone else, but ever since February 27, 2005 this question has held more weight over the top of me than 40 bags of elephants.

Do I have a sister?

I have a brother. I have two sisters-in-law. This I know for sure. But do I have a sister?

I did have a sister. Five years ago today I had a sister. I had a sister and we were "eleven months apart" we would tell everyone with rolling eyes when they asked if we were twins.

And then five years ago tomorrow happened. 

And here's where it becomes a lonely mess. I never knew life without a sister. We were so opposite that we became each other's strengths. So what happens- at the age of 28 when it's all taken away? When everything you ever knew becomes a lie? You begin to question everything you believed in. You start talking to ghosts. You start desperately to write left handed because she was. You start trying to figure out how to delete her number from your phone. You start to try to become whole. And the entire time, you feel dropped in the middle of the ocean at night without a raft. 

And in some odd twist of things, the movie that Julie and I would always sing at the tops of our lungs became my life.  Everyone fighting some stupid battle over emotional territory, Jets and Sharks like. 

I still haven't been able to watch West Side Story in these five years of ... after. And it wasn't our only movie, but it's so much become her that I haven't wanted to open that part back up. Not that she got it in the back with a knife in the alley or shot in a basketball court at night, (apartment fire) but it's there. The sickening void is still there. 

And just in the way that there is a B.C. and an A.D. and we all live our existence to those measures of time, that's the way this whole business has been for me, too. 

"I had a sister then"

"Ooh, that's back when I had a sister"

"...Oh yeah, that's me now". 

That's just how it is, I suppose when something so ridiculously tragic happens. That's how you wrap your mind around it. Measures of time. 

So Julie, Judy, Jude. Hey. 

Oh, FYI The Beatles Hey Jude/Revolution LP was released on this date in 1970. That was her song. Weird. Because on this date in 2005 it was my sister's last day on Earth. 

Not to bum you out or anything. Just some thoughts I've never been able to get down. 

"When you're a Jet, you're a Jet all the way from your first cigarette to your last dying day". 

This I know for sure.