My Mariah Carey Year

On December 31 I promised my 2014 self that my 2015 self would be a better self. I've become maybe a worse self. 

New Year's Eve was wraught with potential. I was serious about it, too. 

"One more day of wasting hours on tumblr then it's serious business and a new you!" I exclaimed with gusto, only silently and to myself. I did come up with this plan while scrolling tumblr, though so I should've known it was going to fail. But! I was serious. My neighbor came over that evening with champagne and I joked that 2015 was my diva year! Then I thought about divas and champagne which naturally brought me to Mariah Carey and I came to an epiphany. I might be entering my embarrassing Mariah Carey years. As the night wore on and drinks were drunk my tv started playing One Direction performing on New Year's Rocking Eve or whichever one it was and I embarked on a one woman mission to make sure everyone knew that Harry Styles is handsome and beautiful. And charming! (And possibly gay.) And funny. And I wouldn't shut up about it. The rest of the night. 

Seriously.

Source: dailymail.com.uk

Seriously though, right????

Mariah Carey: Level 2

Source: tumblr

Guys, I've been in a rut. Like an unmotivated, crabby, diva-like rut. Maybe I'm overwhelmed with it all. Or maybe I'm bored. Maybe it's because I've been waiting an eternity for Mad Men to return. And Bates Motel is not back yet either. And LOST has been over for 4 and a half years and no one wants to go back to the island with me. 

Source: reddit

I came to this post trying compare my year with Mariah Carey but I think I'm actually just Jack Sheppard, Season 3. Both involve drinking so, whatever, I'll continue on.

This Season 3 Jack Sheppard rut is kind of ruining my plans. I'm not sewing, I'm not writing, I'm not cleaning my house- though to be fair, that has little to do with a rut and more to do with that I would like a maid please. And a nanny. I would like to sit around in kicky little outfits cracking bad jokes and singing to no one in particular while someone else does all the washing and sandwich making. I need an Alice to my Carol Brady is what I'm getting at. 

Source: fanpix.famousfix.com

So that's where I've been; sitting on my couch and avoiding facebook except when I think of something funny, scrolling tumblr and twitter, and thinking about how I should do something and then getting mad when someone (the husband) suggests that I get up and do something. I've also been busy breaking up fisticuffs between the children. This also makes me crabby. And diva-like. And wishing for an Alice. 

Alright I need to wrap this up because I'm supposed to be writing a PTA fundraising letter and I don't think they'd dig any Harry Styles or Carol Brady references in it so, I kind of have to buckle down on this even though we all know that Harry Styles sells. I'm just saying. Think it over, PTA. 

Of Being a Fangirl

If there is one thing about me that will forever hold true it is that I am a fangirl. If I decide that I like something, I go big, I go hard, and sometimes it makes me pee my pants. But there is no shame in this game. 

Lately there's been a little shame. 

But we'll get back to Mr. Styles in a minute. 

Anyone who's had a 5 minute conversation with me has had to discuss my favorite Beatle, my favorite Beatle's son, my favorite Monkee, my theory on Mad Men, Harry Styles' hair, my favorite character on I Love Lucy, baseball, and has seen me cry at the mere mention of LOST. I am an insufferable bore and I don't know how I still have friends.

Speaking of friends, I will also gladly discuss F•R•I•E•N•D•S and how horrible I think Monica's hair was and how I hate chunky 90's shoes and oh my god I took a facebook "Which Friend are you?" quiz and I'm Chandler but I think I'm probably Ross, if anyone is interested in that subject. 

Yet each one of these topics is a tree in the bigger, much more interesting and complex forest that houses them. And that forest of obsession is well-kept and coveted by the fangirls and fanboys that sow it. 

Now me being obsessed is nothing new. Me being obsessed with One Direction, that's pretty new. I am currently completely wrapped up in the soap opera that is the Harry Styles/ Louis Tomlinson possible hidden love story as depicted through the symbolism of Harry Styles' instagram posts and possible PR seeding. No seriously, it's a thing. A very, very fascinating thing. And whether it ends up being real or a very elaborate head cannon created and built upon by fans, doesn't matter to me in the same way it doesn't matter if reality TV is scripted. You have me. I'm hooked. 

 

Now, just spending a few minutes on tumblr in any fandom, you will inevitably come across the most realistic photoshopped pictures you have ever seen, the cutest drawings you've ever seen, the most amazing sketches and art, a lot of it is kind of smutty but it's amazing. And the well edited videos, the sense of humor and comradreie. And then there's the fanfiction which gets all kinds of eye rolls and shade from the outside world but it might hold the greatest admiration in my heart. I've only ever read Beatles fan fiction because it's the only fanfiction that has held my interest, however the very fact that it is a thing that people are so passionate about makes my English Majored heart want to burst. And going back to the One Direction fandom, there are a lot of teenagers coming up with this stuff, writing, photoshopping, creating, studying entertainment law and marketing and body language analysis, tattoo symbolism, fashion and probably the most beautiful part in any of this, these kids are fighting for equal rights and getting very involved in the LGBTQ+ community and embracing their fellow fandom on whatever choices and hardships the others are going through. It's really quite beautiful. 

I love the fangirls and fanboys. They are my people. 

Now excuse me while I go find out what shoes Louis Tomlinson is wearing today. It might be another clue.